How To Be A Boss Ass Bitch

It feels like a common occurrence where I have conversations with my girl friends where we spend time questioning the validity of our emotions (hint: they’re always valid). You and I both know that women are incredibly strong and put up with a lot of shit. Throughout our lives we’re directly and indirectly told to make ourselves smaller (“10 Diet Tips for Summer!”, “Sit Like a Lady!”) and a lot of the time shoulder a lot of responsibility, with women spending an average of 4.5 hours a day on unpaid work globally.

What’s that? It’s 2016 men and women are now treated equally I here you cry?

Melinda Gates, the philanthropist and mother of three, wrote in her annual open letter, co-penned with her husband Bill Gates that “Unless things change, girls today will spend hundreds of thousands more hours than boys doing unpaid work simply because society assumes it’s their responsibility.”

According to the Australian Human Rights Commission, here in Australia women comprise roughly 46 per cent of all employees but take home on average $283.20 less than men each week. The national gender pay gap is currently at 18.2 per cent, which has remained stuck between 15 per cent and 18 per cent for the past two decades and according to the United Nations, Australia has one of the highest rates of reported sexual assault in the world.

I could go on and on but instead I would rather help you reach the level of being a boss ASS BITCH that you deserve! Sure sometimes the odds may seem against us and these things may occasionally weigh heavily on your shoulders, but we got this! We’re strong individuals after all. The word bitch is often used to vilify women but I once heard a comedian say ‘bitch’ stood for ‘Being In Total Control of Herself’ and I love that – let’s take that word, make it our own and wear the label with pride.

Women are incredible goddesses, if you’re reading this and identify as a woman then you my friend, are a GODDESS! I am aware it’s a lot easier to say you’re a goddess than to feel it, and it’s a lot easier to say you’re going to act like a boss ass  bitch than actually do it but you’ve got to fake it till you make it baby.

Step 1:

Put on an outfit that makes you feel fierce and confident. It could be all black, sequins galore, show a ton of skin or absolutely none, chuck it on and wear it with pride! Radiate in the uniqueness that is you and ignore the stares that may follow you. As long as you feel good, we’re good.

Step 2:

While building up your own self confidence build up the other women in your life too, encourage them to be the best that they can be but also keep in mind that what empowers one woman might not empower another. Be successful on your own terms.

Step 3:

We both know that you’re not going to feel 100% kick-ass all the time and that’s ok. It is the absolute dream to always be feeling yourself but sometimes that’s just not going to be a reality. We all have doubts and insecurities. On those days that you’re not feeling too crash hot it’s important that you put yourself first and make sure that you’re looking after yourself.

Step 4:

Surround yourself with positivity, which means letting go of those toxic friends who were making you feel ways that you don’t deserve. Obviously we can’t always be perfect but if you have a friend who consistently makes you feel rubbish then it’s probably time to cut them loose. It sucks to let friendships go, especially when there are happy memories attached, but it’s time to make room for those who will treat you with the respect and love you deserve.

Step 5:

You also no longer have time for boys that waste your time and you don’t play games. When it comes to dating be upfront about what you want so that way further down the line you have less of a chance of feeling frustrated. Gone are the days of deciphering a text message for two hours, you’re a grown woman who has more important things to do. If someone is looking for what you’re looking for, great. If not, bye.

Step 6:

Sex can be great but sometimes the people we have sex with don’t have our sexual health in mind. It’s our job to look after our body, which deserves more respect than the old “I don’t have a condom” line. No condom? No sex for you, buddy. If you’re a fan of casual sex then start carrying condoms around yourself and take charge of your own sexual health. But of course sometimes we slip up. If that happens book yourself a sexual health check up asap!

Step 7:

Demand. Good. Sex. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, there are countless amount of times where men use women as a tool to simply jerk themselves off, which is just selfish and plain rude. Build up your confidence and start asking for what exactly you want in the bedroom. If you don’t ask, then you’re probably not going to get it.

Step 8:

Realising that the word ’emotional’ isn’t an insult. So often women are told that they have to be emotional but not too emotional and they have to care but not care too much, otherwise they’re painted as being ‘crazy’ and ‘over the top’. I’ve been guilty of doing this so much in my life, especially when I was younger where I thought for me to be seen as ‘cool’ and ‘strong’ I had to act emotionless. We need to rewrite that idea; a strong ass women is someone who recognises that *shock horror* women have thoughts, feelings, emotions, ideas and beliefs. Your emotions are too much for someone? That’s their problem, not yours.

Step 9:

Stop apologising for who you are and the space that you take up! Think about how often you say sorry in a week, even a day, crazy isn’t it? So often I have had to stop myself from saying sorry. Try saying thank you, excuse me, pardon me etc etc instead of uttering that word. Say sorry only when you actually need to. You know how to apologise but you sure as hell won’t be ‘sorry’ for simply being yourself.
Disclaimer: I do understand that some women do not live in a society where they are able to put these steps into action. Some women aren’t able to receive an education, let alone wear what they want when they want. Oppression is different for women across the globe and sadly sometimes others treatment of women can depend on the colour of their skin, their religion or where they’re from. I hope to one day live in a world where the oppression of women is something that we teach our daughters as a history lesson, not a reality.
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Basic HTML is allowed. Your email address will not be published.

Subscribe to this comment feed via RSS

%d bloggers like this: