Dear Past Billie,
I know you’ve spent a good chunk of 2016 worrying about your present and your future which hasn’t been helped by the fact that this year has been a bit of a mystery. Some of the time you’ve had no idea what you were doing or where you were going and spent time wondering whether you’ll end up where you want to. I know you have often thought “there must be more to life than this”, your head has always been filled with grandiose ideas and dreams but I know you have believed that you don’t have the qualifications or money to make them happen… but I’m here to tell you that they will, just not at the pace you want them to.
There have been days where you have been unbelievably productive, where you have worked, done some painting, writing, socialising and cleaning or you have had not so productive days where you have just sat at home watching Netflix. There is obviously nothing wrong with either but I know you think there is, you just need to give yourself a break.
You’re not going to reach all of your goals in bounding strides and accomplish them all in one year but you are always slowly but surely working towards them. On those days that you have spent at home doing ‘me time’, ignore the “OMG what am I doing with my life”, “I’m not a productive member of society” and “I am so LAZY who the hell do I think I am?!?” thoughts, it’s not a healthy way of thinking at all.
Ignore the pressure that makes you feel like you should have your life sorted out now, that you should be earning the big bucks and that you have to be in the workforce now climbing the corporate ladder – life will be more fun when you do.
I know right now that you’re in a job that you have a love/hate relationship with, you don’t feel appreciated, you’re treated like a robot and you feel like you have nothing to show from your degree but right now as I write this I have a new job that is an extremely positive workplace (even though it’s not in our field but I’m sure we’ll get there), I have a travel writing internship in Bali coming up that will give me invaluable experience and will also give me tools that I can use to apply for jobs or internships as I will have published work!!
Keep chugging along and you’ll get to where you need to be.
Present Billie xx